I guess it’s one of those disadvantages you’d rather have. I mean, some people believe that it’s better not to have anything because you’d have nothing to lose.
I thought it was a real advantage for me to live near the place where I work. Very short commute time and even when I wake up late, I can hurry up and get to the office on time. And it was an advantage, too, that most of my co-workers lived near the office because that meant that we didn’t have to go very far whenever we had non-work-related events. Dinner would be at the mall that’s less thatn 4km from my house. Drinks would be at a neighboring subdivision. Easy to get to. And in case any of those places were already closed well, that’s where my house comes in.
It’s just in the middle of where everyone else lives. Well, more or less. Of course, its proximity wouldn’t be half as advantageous if I didn’t have nice parents who let me entertain people and not a lot of neighbors who complain about noise and whatever. The best part? Or so I thought, was that while at the end of the day, everyone else had to leave, I didn’t have to. I could just take a few steps and sleep in my own bed. Of course, this turned out to be the absolute worst part as well, which I guess is one of those things that people mean when they say that God has a sense of humor. That what you thought was the best thing could actually be the worst thing and the vice-versa.
See, while everyone else got to plan who rides with whom, I’m left to just watch as they leave me behind. I can’t go with them of course. I’m already home!
I miss out on a lot, actually. Every time anyone needs anything, it’s my responsibility to find it and get it on account of it’s my house and what do they know about where my family keeps things? As well, I’m left with the clean-up.
In a way it makes me feel important because it means that they need me or I can help or that I’m not completely useless. But sometimes it can feel like you’re working for your friends and you can’t just enjoy yourself because it’s more or less your responsibility to make sure that everyone’s fine and dandy. I mean, if they get bored, they’re sure to think of the venue where they got bored and I don’t want my house to be labeled in their minds as a boring venue.
But definitely, the worst part of being the hostess is waving goodbye to everyone as they leave. And when they left, I was alone. I mean, there were other people in the house but they were asleep and it was just so quiet.
I have half a mind never to invite guests over again just so I could avoid that feeling of getting left. *sigh* It feels really sad.